THE TAPPING SOLUTION
LOSING WEIGHT AND LETTING GO OF FEAR, GUILT AND SHAME AROUND FOOD
Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. - THOMAS A.EDISON
Marie couldn't decide what she was more stressed out about : her extra weight or what do to in order to lose that weight.
She had tried every diet, every exercise program -- and nothing seemed to work. When we met, she was ready to give up. Was losing a few pounds worthy the misery she was putting herself through?
Marie's problem is one that I see again and again. Her situation gives rise to a few questions : What happened to food? What happened to the joy of eating? What happened to eating meals in peace? What happened to feeling grateful, nourished, and warmed by a meal made with love? At one point in our history, food was a friend, a provider, a sustainer, the root of life. It contained within it our memories, our families, and our heritage. But recently, food has turned into something else. For many of us, food is less a source of nourishment than a source of . . .
STRESS, FEAR, ANGER, GUILT.
Cravings. weight gain. toxins. "Do I eat this?" "Don't eat that! " "I feel guilty about eating this." "I can't believe I ate that!"
My question is , when did food become such a pain?
But back to Marie. Why was she not losing weight? Why was she so miserable when it came to eating?
As far as I can see I, there are two factor at play when it comes to weight issues, both of which can be significantly impacted by tapping. The first factor is the reality of our current food landscape. Food has, in many ways, become "stuff in a box." This is a subject that hundreds of books have been written about, so I'm not going to go into detail here. But suffice it to say that we are truly, deeply disconnected from our food. Once we started processing, packaging, freezing, and shipping our food, our relationship to we what we eat changed in a dramatic way -- and not for the better. Most of the stuff we're eating either barely qualifies as food or is outright harmful to our bodies.
I wish I could say that tapping will make any food you eat healthier. But even with an elevated consciousness, positive thoughts , and a high vibration, you can't turn that MacDonald's, MosBurger or BurgerKing cheeseburger into something nourishing for your body.
I could go on and on about how much better off we are to start with good, fresh, local organic food that is full of nutrients and life force. food that can actually help us, rather than be a burden on our systems. But again, that's a different blog-post. Here I want to address something that tapping really can help with : the confusion Marie suffered around what she should and should not be eating.
We've heard so many different theories. We've been told, "Make sure to eat this!" by one expert, while the next expert insists, "Whatever you do, don't eat that!" It's enough to make our heads spin. it's gotten to a point where what we choose to eat is of far less consequence than the poison pill of negative emotions and stress that we swallow along with the food.
Marie recounted her 20-year endeavor to lose weight. For a decade, she was obsessed with "fat-free" and ate all sorts of stuff out of a box. in her mind -- because of what the media and "food" companies told her -- eating fat-free foods would help keep the fat off. It was obvious to Marie that this wasn't working, but she kept doing it. She thought that there must be something wrong with her or that she wasn't doing enough, because everyone in the commercials selling the fat-free stuff looked happy and skinny.
Next, she went on the diet roller coaster : Atkins Diet, South Beach Diet, grapefruit diet, Blood Type Diet, and on and on. With each new diet book she bought and tried to follow, her confusion and frustration grew. "Didn't the last book say the exact opposite of this?"
After Marie recounted her history, I knew the first thing we had to do was quiet down some of the mental noise she experienced around food and dieting. Just as when we tapped on the general feelings of being overwhelmed and anxiety of modern life, most of us have some global tapping to do around food and dieting. Without this initial tapping, we're often so stressed out and unclear that it's hard to find the right setup statement.
So let's do some general tapping now, to ease that burden a bit before we get into the specifics.
TAPPING SCRIPT : Stress about Food
(The tapping points chart can be found here, click here)
Let's see what your starting point is around food. Say out loud , "I am stressed out, anxious, and overwhelmed about food and what to eat and not eat."
On a 0-to-10 scale __ 10 being 100 percent true and 0 being not true at all -- how true does that feel? It doesn't have to be exact or perfect, just write it down on a piece of paper.
Now let's getting tapping!
.................................
Tapping Tip : Have You Been Doing the Actual Tapping?
I don't mean to be harsh here, but if you've been reading this blog-post and not doing the tapping, you're wasting your time. The difference between tapping and other systems is that tapping can make change happen this isn't just intellectual exploration. I don't want you to walk away knowing more about food and your experience with it; I want you to walk away being different around food and you experience with it. So get tapping !
...................................
(Do the action : say out the script, here we are processing the negative)
Karate chop: "Even though I'm really stressed out about what I should and shouldn't be eating, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Karate chop: "Even though I can't stop worrying about what's good for me and what's bad for me, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Karate chop: "Even though I've heard so many different things about food and I'm overwhelmed and don't know what to do, I choose to relax now."
Good, after these 3-Karate chops, proceed to tapping :
(Tapping point : say these script while tapping the point)
Eyebrow: "All this stress around food ...
Side of Eye: Should I eat this?
Under Eye: I can't eat that!
Under Nose: This is good for me ...
Chin: That's bad for me ...
Collarbone: Or is it?
Under Arm: I just don't know what to eat ...
Top of Head: So stressed out about eating ..."
Eyebrow: "I've read so many different things ...
Side of Eye: Everyone seems to disagree about what to eat!
Under Eye: I'm confused, scared, and stressed about food ...
Under Nose: All this stress around food ...
Chin: Releasing all this stress around food ...
Collarbone: All this anxiety around food ...
Under Arm: I shouldn't eat this ...
Top of Head: I shouldn't eat that ...
Eyebrow: "Should, shouldn't, should, shouldn't...
Side of Eye: So much confusion...
Under Eye: Such a burden ...
Under Nose: So much anxiety ...
Chin: So much stress ...
Collarbone: All around food ...
Under Arm: This stress around food ...
Top of Head: Releasing all this stress around food.
If you're still feeling strongly negative, or if other things have come up, tap on those specifically. otherwise, let's do some positive tapping.
Eyebrow: " I choose to relax around food now ...
Side of Eye: I choose to feel safe around food now ...
Under Eye: Food is safe ...
Under Nose: I am safe ...
Chin: I am at peace and easily choose the foods that best nourish me ...
Collarbone: I relax around food, enjoying every bite I eat, regardless of what it is ...
Under Arm: Once I choose to eat something, I relax and release any guilt, fear, or anxiety around it.
Top of Head: I choose to relax around food."
Eyebrow: "My body knows exactly what it wants and needs ...
Side of Eye: I attract all the right information to choose the best food for me ...
Under Eye: Food is safe ...
Under Nose: I am safe ...
Chin: I choose to relax now ...
Collarbone: I let go of any fear, guilt, or anxiety around food ...
Under Arm: Letting it go ...
Top of Head: Letting it go ...
Take a deep breath . . . and let it go.
--------------------------------------------
How are you feeling? let's check in, Say out loud, " I am stressed out, anxious, and overwhelmed about food and what to eat and not eat."
How true does that feel now? Did your original rating number written on the paper, go down? What else came up when you were doing the tapping? remember, when you're doing "global" tapping like this, you really want to pay attention to specific things that come up along the way. I can't instruct you to tap on specific experiences you've had, because I don't know what they are! But you do -- so as anything pops up, tap on it and release it. The more specific you get, the more the global tapping will stick.
Marie and I spent most of the session tapping on her stress about food and dieting. I had her recount her experiences of the past 20 years, focusing on her emotions along the way. For example, she told me that when she was on the South Beach Diet, it was a particularly hard time in her life and she remembers looking at the book in anger. So I had her recall that memory and tap on that. On and on we went, detailing her emotions, specific memories, and anything else that up about her weight-loss journey.
When we were done, Marie reported that she felt lighter than she had in years. And she was not just emotionally lighter; she was shocked that her body itself felt so much better. She had an enthusiasm and passion that was missing at the beginning of the session. As happens with Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), the cognitive shift was profound.
"You know, the last 20 years of dieting have been tough, but I've learned so much," she said. " I know what works for me now, and I know what makes me feel good. I also know what I have to do to lose weight. And if it doesn't happen immediately, that's okay, too!"
As I shared , I'm always surprised when people say their pain is truly gone. And I feel the same way when this kind of cognitive shift happens. People come from such a different perspective after EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) -- a perspective that is wise, compassionate, and peaceful. Often it feels like I'm talking to a new person. In reality, it's the person who was always there but was being drowned out by the noise of negative experiences, emotions, and beliefs.
When I checked back in with Marie a few weeks later, she was happy to report that she had lost seven pounds with little effort beyond tapping. But even more than the weight loss, she emphasized that she felt more peaceful about food and her weight than ever before. She reported, "When I think back on how stressed out, angry, and confused I was about food, I can't believe it. I feel like I have my life back. Even people around me are noticing a new vibrancy and energy in me!"
------------------------------------------- Ask Yourself . . . Go Back in Time
Most of us have a long and rocky relationship with food and our bodies. If you relate to Marie's story, then you might want to try the same exercise she and I did together. You can write this out with pen and paper, or you can also do it verbally with a friend.
Think back through your experiences with weight loss.
When did you first notice that you weren't happy with your body? What diet or exercise did you try?
What came next?
What happened next?
What else did you try?
How did you feel during that time?
What beliefs did you adopt during this process?
Step by step, remember what this journey looked like. Tap-on any relevant events, emotions, or beliefs that come up. If you're doing this with a friend, simply tell your story. Keep tapping on each important point in the story until you feel that the emotions charge is gone. At zero, 0.
This is quite a long story for many of us, so feel free to take notes on what comes up to ensure that you clear it fully. It might not happen all at once -- you might spend a week or a month tapping on each element -- but stick with it. You'll be amazed by how you feel when you are done !
-------------------------------------------
I can't emphasize this enough : the stress you feel about food and weight loss itself can be the very thing that keeps you stuck . yes, there are often other limiting beliefs, which we'll explore later here, but start by letting go of the overall stress and feelings of being overwhelmed. As we'll see in the next section, that very stress can be what is making you gain weight -- or not be able to lose it.
Why Does Tapping Help with Weight Loss? The Stress Connection
When Marie stopped stressing out about food and weight loss, she lost weight. Why? Well, the stress response can cause a massive cascade of events in your body, including:
~ On average four times less blood flow to your digestive system;
~ Less oxygen to your gut;
~ Lower absorption of nutrients;
~ Less enzyme production in your gut. ( As much as 20,000 times less! This is one of the reasons why, when you eat a meal while you're stressed, you'll often feel bloated and uncomfortable.)
~ Increase in excretion of important nutrients, such as vitamins and minerals.
~ Decrease in gut flora population.
~ Increase in cholesterol.
~ Increase in cortisol and insulin levels
The last item is particularly important for weight loss, because when your cortisol is consistently elevated, it's hard to lose weight or build muscle. In fact, you're more likely to gain weight, particularly around your midsection.
When Marie relaxed and stopped stressing about food, her body responded. I think i's have to put out the next diet book, and here's what it will claim:
"Following this diet, you'll lose weight, increase the oxygen to your gut, increase the absorption of nutrients, increase enzyme production (so you won't feel bloated), increase retention of vital nutrients, increase healthy gut flora population, lower your cholesterol, and lower your cortisol and insulin levels. What is this magic diet? What do you eat? Whatever you want! Just relax while you're doing it . . .
It'd be a short book, but it would be guaranteed to work for those who follow it!
You don't have to wait for the book to come out; you have everything you need here. When you lower stress levels (and obviously it's not just stress about food -- that's what we've been focusing on here, but lowering stress about anything and everything is important), then you'll lose the weight.
That's why people who use EFT on their general stress and feelings of being overwhelmed, traumatic events in their past, and other problems in their lives often lose weight without even trying!
EFT for Food Cravings
I shared that when I am speaking in front of a live audience, I often work on EFT for pain because the results can be so dramatic and easy to witness and measure. The other problem I often turn to is food cravings, because those are also easy to witness and measure.
Working with food cravings in front of a live audience follows a similar trajectory every time. First, we all have some good laughs as I introduce a bag of candy, chocolate, cookies, or other treats people often crave. This can be particularly amusing when I'm speaking in front of a very health-conscious crowd and they admit they are craving this junk food! I pass around the bag and have people pick their favorite. I have them look at it, smell it, and do whatever else it takes to bring their craving levels up. Then I ask for a few volunteers who want to work live on-stage to reduce those cravings.
I first ask
LOSING WEIGHT AND LETTING GO OF FEAR, GUILT AND SHAME AROUND FOOD
Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. - THOMAS A.EDISON
Marie couldn't decide what she was more stressed out about : her extra weight or what do to in order to lose that weight.
She had tried every diet, every exercise program -- and nothing seemed to work. When we met, she was ready to give up. Was losing a few pounds worthy the misery she was putting herself through?
Marie's problem is one that I see again and again. Her situation gives rise to a few questions : What happened to food? What happened to the joy of eating? What happened to eating meals in peace? What happened to feeling grateful, nourished, and warmed by a meal made with love? At one point in our history, food was a friend, a provider, a sustainer, the root of life. It contained within it our memories, our families, and our heritage. But recently, food has turned into something else. For many of us, food is less a source of nourishment than a source of . . .
STRESS, FEAR, ANGER, GUILT.
Cravings. weight gain. toxins. "Do I eat this?" "Don't eat that! " "I feel guilty about eating this." "I can't believe I ate that!"
My question is , when did food become such a pain?
But back to Marie. Why was she not losing weight? Why was she so miserable when it came to eating?
As far as I can see I, there are two factor at play when it comes to weight issues, both of which can be significantly impacted by tapping. The first factor is the reality of our current food landscape. Food has, in many ways, become "stuff in a box." This is a subject that hundreds of books have been written about, so I'm not going to go into detail here. But suffice it to say that we are truly, deeply disconnected from our food. Once we started processing, packaging, freezing, and shipping our food, our relationship to we what we eat changed in a dramatic way -- and not for the better. Most of the stuff we're eating either barely qualifies as food or is outright harmful to our bodies.
I wish I could say that tapping will make any food you eat healthier. But even with an elevated consciousness, positive thoughts , and a high vibration, you can't turn that MacDonald's, MosBurger or BurgerKing cheeseburger into something nourishing for your body.
I could go on and on about how much better off we are to start with good, fresh, local organic food that is full of nutrients and life force. food that can actually help us, rather than be a burden on our systems. But again, that's a different blog-post. Here I want to address something that tapping really can help with : the confusion Marie suffered around what she should and should not be eating.
We've heard so many different theories. We've been told, "Make sure to eat this!" by one expert, while the next expert insists, "Whatever you do, don't eat that!" It's enough to make our heads spin. it's gotten to a point where what we choose to eat is of far less consequence than the poison pill of negative emotions and stress that we swallow along with the food.
Marie recounted her 20-year endeavor to lose weight. For a decade, she was obsessed with "fat-free" and ate all sorts of stuff out of a box. in her mind -- because of what the media and "food" companies told her -- eating fat-free foods would help keep the fat off. It was obvious to Marie that this wasn't working, but she kept doing it. She thought that there must be something wrong with her or that she wasn't doing enough, because everyone in the commercials selling the fat-free stuff looked happy and skinny.
Next, she went on the diet roller coaster : Atkins Diet, South Beach Diet, grapefruit diet, Blood Type Diet, and on and on. With each new diet book she bought and tried to follow, her confusion and frustration grew. "Didn't the last book say the exact opposite of this?"
After Marie recounted her history, I knew the first thing we had to do was quiet down some of the mental noise she experienced around food and dieting. Just as when we tapped on the general feelings of being overwhelmed and anxiety of modern life, most of us have some global tapping to do around food and dieting. Without this initial tapping, we're often so stressed out and unclear that it's hard to find the right setup statement.
So let's do some general tapping now, to ease that burden a bit before we get into the specifics.
TAPPING SCRIPT : Stress about Food
(The tapping points chart can be found here, click here)
Let's see what your starting point is around food. Say out loud , "I am stressed out, anxious, and overwhelmed about food and what to eat and not eat."
On a 0-to-10 scale __ 10 being 100 percent true and 0 being not true at all -- how true does that feel? It doesn't have to be exact or perfect, just write it down on a piece of paper.
Now let's getting tapping!
.................................
Tapping Tip : Have You Been Doing the Actual Tapping?
I don't mean to be harsh here, but if you've been reading this blog-post and not doing the tapping, you're wasting your time. The difference between tapping and other systems is that tapping can make change happen this isn't just intellectual exploration. I don't want you to walk away knowing more about food and your experience with it; I want you to walk away being different around food and you experience with it. So get tapping !
...................................
(Do the action : say out the script, here we are processing the negative)
Karate chop: "Even though I'm really stressed out about what I should and shouldn't be eating, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Karate chop: "Even though I can't stop worrying about what's good for me and what's bad for me, I deeply and completely accept myself."
Karate chop: "Even though I've heard so many different things about food and I'm overwhelmed and don't know what to do, I choose to relax now."
Good, after these 3-Karate chops, proceed to tapping :
(Tapping point : say these script while tapping the point)
Eyebrow: "All this stress around food ...
Side of Eye: Should I eat this?
Under Eye: I can't eat that!
Under Nose: This is good for me ...
Chin: That's bad for me ...
Collarbone: Or is it?
Under Arm: I just don't know what to eat ...
Top of Head: So stressed out about eating ..."
Eyebrow: "I've read so many different things ...
Side of Eye: Everyone seems to disagree about what to eat!
Under Eye: I'm confused, scared, and stressed about food ...
Under Nose: All this stress around food ...
Chin: Releasing all this stress around food ...
Collarbone: All this anxiety around food ...
Under Arm: I shouldn't eat this ...
Top of Head: I shouldn't eat that ...
Eyebrow: "Should, shouldn't, should, shouldn't...
Side of Eye: So much confusion...
Under Eye: Such a burden ...
Under Nose: So much anxiety ...
Chin: So much stress ...
Collarbone: All around food ...
Under Arm: This stress around food ...
Top of Head: Releasing all this stress around food.
If you're still feeling strongly negative, or if other things have come up, tap on those specifically. otherwise, let's do some positive tapping.
Eyebrow: " I choose to relax around food now ...
Side of Eye: I choose to feel safe around food now ...
Under Eye: Food is safe ...
Under Nose: I am safe ...
Chin: I am at peace and easily choose the foods that best nourish me ...
Collarbone: I relax around food, enjoying every bite I eat, regardless of what it is ...
Under Arm: Once I choose to eat something, I relax and release any guilt, fear, or anxiety around it.
Top of Head: I choose to relax around food."
Eyebrow: "My body knows exactly what it wants and needs ...
Side of Eye: I attract all the right information to choose the best food for me ...
Under Eye: Food is safe ...
Under Nose: I am safe ...
Chin: I choose to relax now ...
Collarbone: I let go of any fear, guilt, or anxiety around food ...
Under Arm: Letting it go ...
Top of Head: Letting it go ...
Take a deep breath . . . and let it go.
--------------------------------------------
How are you feeling? let's check in, Say out loud, " I am stressed out, anxious, and overwhelmed about food and what to eat and not eat."
How true does that feel now? Did your original rating number written on the paper, go down? What else came up when you were doing the tapping? remember, when you're doing "global" tapping like this, you really want to pay attention to specific things that come up along the way. I can't instruct you to tap on specific experiences you've had, because I don't know what they are! But you do -- so as anything pops up, tap on it and release it. The more specific you get, the more the global tapping will stick.
Marie and I spent most of the session tapping on her stress about food and dieting. I had her recount her experiences of the past 20 years, focusing on her emotions along the way. For example, she told me that when she was on the South Beach Diet, it was a particularly hard time in her life and she remembers looking at the book in anger. So I had her recall that memory and tap on that. On and on we went, detailing her emotions, specific memories, and anything else that up about her weight-loss journey.
When we were done, Marie reported that she felt lighter than she had in years. And she was not just emotionally lighter; she was shocked that her body itself felt so much better. She had an enthusiasm and passion that was missing at the beginning of the session. As happens with Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), the cognitive shift was profound.
"You know, the last 20 years of dieting have been tough, but I've learned so much," she said. " I know what works for me now, and I know what makes me feel good. I also know what I have to do to lose weight. And if it doesn't happen immediately, that's okay, too!"
As I shared , I'm always surprised when people say their pain is truly gone. And I feel the same way when this kind of cognitive shift happens. People come from such a different perspective after EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) -- a perspective that is wise, compassionate, and peaceful. Often it feels like I'm talking to a new person. In reality, it's the person who was always there but was being drowned out by the noise of negative experiences, emotions, and beliefs.
When I checked back in with Marie a few weeks later, she was happy to report that she had lost seven pounds with little effort beyond tapping. But even more than the weight loss, she emphasized that she felt more peaceful about food and her weight than ever before. She reported, "When I think back on how stressed out, angry, and confused I was about food, I can't believe it. I feel like I have my life back. Even people around me are noticing a new vibrancy and energy in me!"
------------------------------------------- Ask Yourself . . . Go Back in Time
Most of us have a long and rocky relationship with food and our bodies. If you relate to Marie's story, then you might want to try the same exercise she and I did together. You can write this out with pen and paper, or you can also do it verbally with a friend.
Think back through your experiences with weight loss.
When did you first notice that you weren't happy with your body? What diet or exercise did you try?
What came next?
What happened next?
What else did you try?
How did you feel during that time?
What beliefs did you adopt during this process?
Step by step, remember what this journey looked like. Tap-on any relevant events, emotions, or beliefs that come up. If you're doing this with a friend, simply tell your story. Keep tapping on each important point in the story until you feel that the emotions charge is gone. At zero, 0.
This is quite a long story for many of us, so feel free to take notes on what comes up to ensure that you clear it fully. It might not happen all at once -- you might spend a week or a month tapping on each element -- but stick with it. You'll be amazed by how you feel when you are done !
-------------------------------------------
I can't emphasize this enough : the stress you feel about food and weight loss itself can be the very thing that keeps you stuck . yes, there are often other limiting beliefs, which we'll explore later here, but start by letting go of the overall stress and feelings of being overwhelmed. As we'll see in the next section, that very stress can be what is making you gain weight -- or not be able to lose it.
Why Does Tapping Help with Weight Loss? The Stress Connection
When Marie stopped stressing out about food and weight loss, she lost weight. Why? Well, the stress response can cause a massive cascade of events in your body, including:
~ On average four times less blood flow to your digestive system;
~ Less oxygen to your gut;
~ Lower absorption of nutrients;
~ Less enzyme production in your gut. ( As much as 20,000 times less! This is one of the reasons why, when you eat a meal while you're stressed, you'll often feel bloated and uncomfortable.)
~ Increase in excretion of important nutrients, such as vitamins and minerals.
~ Decrease in gut flora population.
~ Increase in cholesterol.
~ Increase in cortisol and insulin levels
The last item is particularly important for weight loss, because when your cortisol is consistently elevated, it's hard to lose weight or build muscle. In fact, you're more likely to gain weight, particularly around your midsection.
When Marie relaxed and stopped stressing about food, her body responded. I think i's have to put out the next diet book, and here's what it will claim:
"Following this diet, you'll lose weight, increase the oxygen to your gut, increase the absorption of nutrients, increase enzyme production (so you won't feel bloated), increase retention of vital nutrients, increase healthy gut flora population, lower your cholesterol, and lower your cortisol and insulin levels. What is this magic diet? What do you eat? Whatever you want! Just relax while you're doing it . . .
It'd be a short book, but it would be guaranteed to work for those who follow it!
You don't have to wait for the book to come out; you have everything you need here. When you lower stress levels (and obviously it's not just stress about food -- that's what we've been focusing on here, but lowering stress about anything and everything is important), then you'll lose the weight.
That's why people who use EFT on their general stress and feelings of being overwhelmed, traumatic events in their past, and other problems in their lives often lose weight without even trying!
EFT for Food Cravings
I shared that when I am speaking in front of a live audience, I often work on EFT for pain because the results can be so dramatic and easy to witness and measure. The other problem I often turn to is food cravings, because those are also easy to witness and measure.
Working with food cravings in front of a live audience follows a similar trajectory every time. First, we all have some good laughs as I introduce a bag of candy, chocolate, cookies, or other treats people often crave. This can be particularly amusing when I'm speaking in front of a very health-conscious crowd and they admit they are craving this junk food! I pass around the bag and have people pick their favorite. I have them look at it, smell it, and do whatever else it takes to bring their craving levels up. Then I ask for a few volunteers who want to work live on-stage to reduce those cravings.
I first ask
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