The Energies of Love: Invisible Keys to a Fulfilling Partnership Paperback
by Donna Eden, wife (Author),
David Feinstein, husband (Author),
Click Here to Look Inside the book and read the Foreword, Introduction, from front cover to page 22 and other sample pages.
Donna Eden, wife: is among the world's most sought-after, authoritative, and joyous spokespersons for energy medicine. Her abilities as a healer are legendary. Donna Eden has personally taught more than a hyndred thousand people worldwide how to understand the human body as an energy system.
David Feinstein, Ph.D.,husband: is a clinical psychologist, has served on the faculty of The John Hopkins University School of Medicine and has received nine (9) national awards for his books on consciousness and healing.
The bestselling authors of Energy Medicine and Energy Medicine for Women present a complete program for using energy medicine to heal and strengthen romantic relationships.
A RELATIONSHIP BEGINS WITH THE MEETING OF TWO UNIQUE ENERGIES. Relationship begins with the meeting of two unique energies. This union of energies, though invisible, determines the way you communicate, fight, love, and want to be loved. In this groundbreaking book, the bestselling authors of Energy Medicine draw on the real-life experiences of couples who have attended their popular “Energies of Love” workshops, as well as their own experience as husband and wife, to show how an understanding of your energy system and that of your partner can help you build a more harmonious and loving bond.
We all have different ways of making sense of the world around us, but when faced with conflict, especially with those we care most about, we tend to revert to one of four “Energetic Stress Styles”:
- VISUALS are extremely passionate and inspire others to care about the things they care about, but in moments of conflict, their take on the situation can overshadow what is actually occurring, undermining their ability to empathize with their partner.
- KINESTHETICS are generous, compassionate, and accepting of other people, but their caring nature pulls them in too many directions. They try to meet others’ needs at the expense of their own, which can cause mounting resentment.
- DIGITALS are rational and principled and have a gift for quickly understanding complex situations, but they can become closed to others’ perspectives and feelings.
- TONALS have a gift for understanding others and their dilemmas, but during moments of conflict, their ability to read between the lines can morph into hearing what was never said, felt, or thought.
By learning to better understand you own unique energy system, as well as that of your living partner, you will develop and grow a greater appreciation of your life relationship and build a richer partnership that maintain the spark that keeps your relatioship exciting and enriching.
According to the authors, the strongest relationships are those in which the two parties feel that they are partners on a shared spiritual journey. By helping you better understand your own unique energy system, as well as that of your partner, you will be able to recognize your strengths as a couple-¬and avoid the pitfalls. The Energies of Love serves as a powerful resource for anyone who wishes to build a rich partnership while maintaining the spark that keeps a relationship exciting.
You and Your Partner See Through Different Eyes 23
Energetically, You Become a Different Animal during Relationship Stress
When Donna carefully watches a couple in a stressful encounter, she will see one of four distinct energetic modes emerge in each partner. This shift in energy corresponds with the visual, kinesthetic, digital, and tonal sensory channels we've been discussing. It occurs quite consistently and is independent of intelligence, height, or political party inclination. Yet the energy that dominates for you during relationship stress is as tangible a difference to those who see energy as it the color of your eyes, the breadth of your shoulder, or whether you have an "innie" or an "outie" belly button.
Distortion of the Visual Style
Without the other modes to round out the picture, visuals lose perspective, normally their greatest strength. Their internal take or "view" of the situation overshadows whatever actually occured. Not only does this tunnel vision compellingly distort understanding and undermine empathy, but visuals can quickly assemble a vision of how things should be, or more specifically, of how you should be and what you should do. They tend to embrace this vision wholeheartedly. You, meanwhile, are feeling unseen and are experiencing your visual partner's "helpful" analysis as judgment and blame. With the energy radiating outward from your visual partner during a stressful encounter, the focus moves to you, with emphasis on how you are the cause of theproblem and need to do things differently.
>THE ENERGY DIMENSION<
Visual Stress Style
During times of realtionship stress, for people whose Energetic Stress Style is visual, the body's energies tend to:
~ Concentrate in the head and the upper chest.
~ Then move outward, particularly through the eyes and chest area.
~ Appear to tunnel toward the other person.
Click Here to Look Inside the book and read page 26, 27 and 28.
You and Your Partner See through Different Eyes 29
10. When in Major Conflict with My Partner, My Unspoken Position Is:
a. "You're Wrong!"
b. "I'm Right!"
c. "I'm Angry at You for Making Me Feel Wrong!"
d. "I Don't Want You to Feel Wrong!"
Although the Energetic Stress Style Assessment may lack scintific rigor or validation, it is at least easy to score. Count your total number of a, b, c, and d scores.
The more a's, the more you experience yourself as a =visual,
the more b's = digital,
the more c's = tonal, and
the more d's = kinesthetic.
Once you've scored it for yourself, take the test again rating your partner. Then, if your partner also took the test, compare your scores with your partner's scores on both versions.
Most people score highest in one area, somewhat less on a second, and substantially less on the other two. The top two scores reflect your primary and secondary styles. The primary is inborn, primal. It is what you instinctively rely on during primal threat.
Your secondary style has been nurtured by experience and preference, is often more valued consciously, and may be how you view yourself. This will often account for the difference between the way you scored yourself and the way your partner scored you. recognizing these differences of perception is a start for bridging them and should, for now, at least lead to some intersting discussion.
When Two Energies Dance
One of the most important insight about sex and intimacy to come from the behavioral sciences is deceptively simple. For sex to stay hot within a long-term relationship, you not only must be able to deeply bond with your partner, you must also be able to preserve a separate identity. You must be able to act autonomously and sustain your own center even while deeply registering your partner's needs, expectations, and desires. This delicate interplay between bonding and differentiating is the underlying issue around which many marriages succeed of fail, and it is as much a dance of two energy fields as it is a dance of two personalities.
No matter how much you love one another, if you can't get your energies into harmony and accord, it is going to be a rough roda. All people have strategies for shifting the energy when a relationship becomes tense. Yelling is very popular. So are withdrawing, crying, or having an affair. These all work; each generates a change in the energy. But they are something like symptom-suppressing medication. They may make you feel better for a while, but they don't resolve a thing, and they often have side efects taht are much worse than the original problems. The way you and your partner maintain and mediate the energies between both of you, moment by moment, day by day, month by month, defines your relationship.
A simple technique ....Click Here to Look Inside the book and read page 30 ..
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